January 9, 2012

Anger Diary Issue:  Store Rewards Cards

WHY????  Who was the first store to decide to rip people off by only making sales available to those who carry the stupid MVP/Plus/ExtraCare/etc. cards???  Who has a wallet or a keychain big enough to carry that crap?  It’s not only just an exclusion of sales to non-card-carrying people, now it’s a way to bombard your inbox with spam from every store you’ve ever shopped at!!!  It ticks me off.  Put what you have on sale on sale and make it available to everybody whether they have your stupid piece of plastic with a barcode or not!  And if I’m interested in your updates from your store, I will visit your website and check them out.  Mkay? 

Happiness Journal Tidbit of Gratitude:  My husband’s Cleaning Day

My husband and I have been butting heads for 3 straight days, but I am thankful for the way he has busted his butt and totally cleaned the house today.  He is way less ADHD than me, and doesn’t get distracted with shiny things or boxes of junk like I do.  All the laundry is done and the basement looking better than it has in ages.  While he worked his butt off cleaning, I have been able to get a few “me” things done (working out and dying my hair the exact same color that it was.)  

Declaration of Self:

I am getting stronger (physically) every day and I like it.

Mustard Seeds, Feathers and Sailor Mouths...you know...Christmas...Duh.

Many of us are familiar with the parable of the mustard seed found in the New Testament gospels.  We have been studying the gospel of Mark in Sunday School and I noted a few weeks back that I always think of our children when I hear this parable.  I think of planting these tiny seeds of faith, kindness, and love and praying that one day the seed will grow into something greater than any of us can imagine. 

I didn’t realize how quickly I would see this parable smack me upside the noggin.  It was only but a week later when my nine year old daughter, Natalie said, “Hey mom, listen to this.”  She began to read me the following paper that she had written for a contest at school.

Christmas

By Natalie Griffith

Christmas is not about getting new toys or getting gifts.  It’s about giving and Jesus’s birth.  Yes, you might get toys and other things and that’s fun, but that’s not as important as giving and Jesus’s birth. 

Jesus loves you.  Not everybody goes to church and not everybody loves him.  It’s sad how many people don’t love Him.  He came to earth and then he died for you. 

I go to church and I will always love Him more than anything in the whole world.  Nobody will ever come between me and Jesus.  Some people would do it in a heartbeat, but I don’t know why you would not love Him.  He died for you!

On Christmas when you are opening your presents, don’t forget to think about Jesus’s birthday.  You like your birthday celebration on your birthday.  Don’t you think Jesus likes his birthday celebration?  He will love you no matter what.  He wants you to love him, but he loves you even if you don’t.  Nothing will come between me and Jesus!

Did I mention she is 9?  Yeah. 

When she looked up from her paper, I’m pretty sure you could’ve knocked dear ole Mom over with a feather.  Sure, I take my kids to church.  We pray, we read our Bibles, we try to help others as much as we can.  But then there are times when we’re mean and ugly.  Mom and Dad argue, siblings argue, and we all are just looking out for Number One.  I have a mouth like a sailor when I choose to use it.  I’m not proud of that or the many less than ideal things I have done or said.  I’m just a poor sinner who has fallen off of more wagons than Carter has liver pills.  Aren’t we all though?  Haven’t we all?  “I won’t cuss today.”  (Then I drop a can of tomato sauce on my toe and scream things that would make an entire fleet of sailors get red in the face.)  “I won’t play with this fire or that fire.”  Then we do.  We are all human.  We try, we fail; we fail and we try.  And God loves us through it all, even when we say or do the most bone-headed things we can possibly think of. 

When Natalie read her words, I couldn’t believe what this little person had come to realize.  You can hear the revelations in her writing.  It’s as if everything she has been taught since she came into this world is finally coming together.  Each Sunday that I took her to church…each Sunday School teacher…each Children’s Church teacher…each grandparent, aunt, uncle, and friend—all had planted a tiny mustard seed in this child.  Natalie is going to fail a bazillion times over throughout her life.  She is going to do and say things that I don’t even want to think about.  She’s human.  But I know these seeds are in her heart.  Keep on planting, friends.  You never know what you say or do might take root in another human being.

Natalie Gray Griffith…you inspire me, kiddo.

“Train a child in the ways of the Lord and he will not depart.” ~Proverbs 22:6

Getting ready for Christmas...

My favorite part of Christmas is the ANTICIPATION! 

I knew I wanted to do a Family Advent Calendar to count down the days until Christmas,

but I didn't want it to be about candy or toys. 

I wanted it to be about time and memories. 

I found the idea for this advent calendar from my newest favorite blogspot,

Maple & Magnolia... http://www.mapleandmagnolia.com/ 

She's totally freaking FABULOUS!  Go check it out!

This calendar is from Pottery Barn (available last year.)
How cute, right?  It had a price tag of about $100.

Using that Pottery Barn calendar as inspiration, this calendar was made by Susan over at http://www.mapleandmagnolia.com.  It's so fabulous!  Mine is not NEARLY as fantabulous, but in my (very teensy-weensy) defense, I could not find that SUPER striped ticking

in my small-town fabric "department." 

I think that striped ticking makes Susan's calendar go from Advent to AdventASTIC!

I entertained the idea of doing an Advent Calendar with reds and patterns

like this one below from Kimberly Peterson's blog: http://kimberlypetersen.typepad.com/photos/things_i_made/advent.html

But I really think the cream and black just suits my decor better

and will be something I can customize throughout the years!

So here is what I came up with.  I used a little over 2 yards of canvas. 

I took Susan's advice over at Maple & Magnolia and traded in my needle and thread

for my weapon of choice--glue gun baby!

I cut my squares 6 1/2 inches square and I folded the tops down and glued to avoid fraying.  I used stamps and acrylic paint to stamp on the numbers. 
After that was done, I attached the pockets to the larger piece of canvas...and voila
errr...more like 4 or 5 hours of sitting on the hardwood floor with my aching joints later...
I was finished. 
I folded the top over to make a rod pocket and inserted a dowel rod.  
My plan was to use twine and hang on the wall, but I think I will leave it right where it is in between my tab top curtain panels in the (informal) dining area.

My FINISHED Advent Calendar stuffed with "goodies." :) 
I'm HAPPY with the end result!

My husband was awesome enough to have found these bad boys at Wallyworld today...
  
They are simply money holders and we got them in packs of 8 for 97 cents.  Not bad, huh?

I printed out 25 activities that we we would do as a family and I glued them inside of these cards like so...

And my personal favorite (can't wait til we get to put this one in action!)

While searching for Advent Calendar inspiration over at M & M, I found this totally awesome idea for a HOT BEVERAGE STATION!  Ingenious, right?  Check it out...

Yeah, so after seeing that, I knew I must do one of two things...

either move into Maple & Magnolia's fab farmhouse...

or make myself a hot beverage station...

So I showed up on the doorstep at M&M....

KIDDING! 

(Although the way my sweet children seem to have been posessed by somebody that rhymes with the Bevil tonight....that is starting to look like a viable alternative

Exhibit A

Yeah, I didn't like it either.

So I kept playing around until I decided on this one...

Ahhh....

Now THIS is the Griffith Family Way of Life :)

 

After I had a delish cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream and sprinkles,

it was time to make some ornaments.

So cute.  And So.Darn.Easy.

Found these little shells at the Dollar Store

and simply used my glue gun to attach jute twine to them for hanging. 

Easy.  Peasy.

These will make a LOVELY coastal addition to my tree this year :)

I have a few Thanksgiving tricks up my sleeve, so stay tuned :) 

Come Thou Long Expected Jesus...

"Come Thou Long Expected Jesus" is one of my (newly) favorite Christmas songs.  I'm not sure if my kids (or my husband) even know this IS a Christmas song.  I've know this song for a very long time, but wouldn't have categorized it in the top 10 (or 20 or 30) list of my favorite Christmas carols until recently.
"Come Thou Long Expected Jesus, born to set thy people free.  From our fears and sins release us, let us find our rest in Thee."  Ok, so it's written in "Old English" but the message is still so very clear.
Click it on and listen to it...

It gives me chills.
I think that's the feeling we're SUPPOSED to get as Advent and Christmas approach.  I think we are supposed to feel the profound feeling of ANTICIPATION of the Christ Child!
I have had Christmases where I didn't put Christ at the center of Christmas.  I focused on gifts and hustle and bustle and cooking and baking and decorating...I forgot the real reason.  I didn't anticipate "Thou Long Expected Jesus" the way I should have.  I have let the days zoom by and I have felt downright depressed on December 25 after everything was over and done! 

Depressed?  Really?!  "Come Thou Long Expected Jesus..."  I am supposed to be CELEBRATING the anticipation of a baby who came to earth...not born in The Hilton, but born in the backwoods...in the ghetto...with the lowest of the low.  Why do you think that was?  You think God couldn't have made room at the inn if he would've wanted it that way?  One of the songs that the kids at church are singing in the Christmas Play is called "Part of the Plan."  It was all a part of the plan. 

Have you ever gone to dinner someplace super fancy?  I remember my dad coming home from a dinner at the Greenbrier one time--it was either a retirement dinner or a work-related dinner...something like that.  I remember us laughing as he described the food that was served..."and then there was something that looked like green beans, but there were only four of them."  Ha!  Sometimes "royalty" has a way of making us feel inadequate...not smart enough...not skilled enough...not good enough...unworthy.  Rarely have I ever thought I was lower than cow dung though :)   
Jesus was born next to cow dung.  I bet you never thought of it that way, huh? 
"Come Thou Long Expected Jesus"...anticipation of what was to come...hope and excitement and eagerness.  I never remember seeing anything in the book of Luke about throwing elbows on Black Friday or anxiousness and stress over the the holiday season.

As Christmas fast approaches, don't forget to be in anticipation!  That's what makes this season so alive and full of wonderment!  I plan on doing plenty of decorating and baking (burning) cookies and making all kind of crafty goodness, but I will make sure it's all in anticipation of "Thou Long Expected Jesus."

'Twas the Week Before Thanksving...2006

What an incredibly fast year this has been!  I can remember as I child how my dad and my grandparents would tell me how the time went by so much faster as you got older.  Of course I thought they were full of baloney…once again, I realize how right they are.

In eleven short days, it will be Thanksgiving.  Thanksgiving is so very special to me.  Thanksgiving represents family and thankfulness and tradition—being an only child, I yearned for a Thanksgiving like many folks had—a table set for 20, an actual turkey instead of a just a small turkey breast for three, laughter and silliness, homemade placemats and maybe even Pilgrim and Indian hats. 

People wonder why I go nuts over all sorts of things—birthdays, holidays—you name it.  Well I guess it’s because I finally have a family which is larger than the average one.  I remember back several years…we had my husbands’ parents and his brother and sister-in-law and our nephews and we had my mom and step dad—my 1,000 sq. ft. house runneth over.  I sent out homemade invitations that included the following poem:

‘Twas the week before Thanksgiving

And all across the state

Were Kevin and Amanda saying

“Don’t be Late!”

The table will be set

Especially for you

In hopes that you will come

And join our zoo.

The children will be nestled

In front of the big screen

As Macy’s Thanksgiving Day

Parade is seen.

Perhaps to our wondering

Eyes will appear

One of the Griffiths

Dragging home an 8 point deer.

“Now Perry now Thelma

Now Barry and Mildred!”

On Roger on Angie!

Come and get fed!”

Down Route 18

Down I-64

Now dash away, dash away!

Right to our door!

So spring to your sleigh

Give your team a whistle

And put the pedal to the metal

And sore like a missle!

You will hear us exclaim

‘Ere you pull in the drive

“Happy turkey day to all

And to all a high-five!”

I went down to the church and borrowed a couple of banquet tables.  I put all of my living room furniture against the wall and we had a huge table down the center of my living room and dining room.  Hands-down it was, my favorite Thanksgiving to date.  I love having a houseful of people.  I love the stress and the chaos and all of the bad that goes with the absolute fantastic memories J

I have no idea what we will have in store this Thanksgiving.  I look forward to whatever memories we will make!

Happy Thanksgiving! 

The thankful receiver bears a plentiful harvest.~William Blake

I've always thought Will Smith was amazing...

I have thought Will Smith was a genius from the time I heard an interview with him when I was a kid.  Read this little excerpt about why he vowed not to use profane language in his music years ago.

http://www.wildwildwillsmith.com/bio.html

This video is amazing.  Take a look...

Photo Book

Click here to view this photo book larger

Keep Hoppin'...

Today was the day we collected for our RAOK (Random Acts of Kindess) Day.  I have been promoting this to all of my 721 Facebook friends for a couple of weeks now.  I have asked for donations as simple as old newspapers or bottles of bleach or shampoo.  Natalie, her friend Eve, and I set up at the entrance of the church parking lot this evening at 6:50 and we waited...and waited...and waited...
The only donation we received was a couple of pairs of socks from our Pastor.  I was so disgusted.  I was so discouraged.  See...in my naivity, I had such high hopes for this for my daughter.  I really wanted her to leave the church knowing that a 9 year old girl really CAN make a difference in the world. 
At 7:54 pm, I told the girls it was time to go ahead and pack up.  We hadn't received any donations except for the socks and I was getting tired and still had to hit the grocery store for ice cream for the party tomorrow.  They were persistant, however.  They said they wanted to stay a little while longer.  A few minutes later, a member of our church stopped by and brought us a huge bag of newspapers to take to the shelter. 
Then...a few minutes later...a car pulled in.  It was a "beater" as my husband would call an older car with probably 200k miles on it.  The lady inside looked as if maybe she didn't have a lot.  She had a toddler strapped in a carseat in the back.  She asked the girls what they were doing.  They tried to explain to her and then I stepped in and started to explain, the whole time thinking to myself...this lady is probably thinking we're handing out stuff and wants in on it.  It was a terrible superficial judgement that I made.  We told her what all we were collecting and she sort of giggled and said, "Well I don't have any of that with me, but if I give you all a cash donation, you will get some of those things with it?"  I couldn't believe it.  There I was thinking that as soon as this young lady found out what we were doing that she would exit stage left pronto.  The kind lady then proceeded to tell us how much she loved animals and she knew the shelter helped so many animals and what a great organization SafeHome is.  She told us that she had to utilize SafeHome a while back, so it was very dear to her heart.  Then she unzipped her change purse and handed Natalie a $20 bill.  Tears welled up in my eyes and I knew this was all supposed to happen.  It never fails.  Every.single.time.  I was planning on getting bleach and laundry detergent and dog food.  That's all.  I wasn't expecting blessings. 
And we were blessed. 
After the lady left, Natalie said, "Mom, I wanted to cry when she was telling us that."  I smiled and said, "I did."  And so it begins...a spirit for giving; Seeing the circle of being in need and then getting back on your feet and giving back. 
A few minutes after that happened, JoAnn & Marty Forbes walked up with a bag of donations for SafeHomes and I remembered when Marty's mom, Pat "Punk" Kegley Tabor brought me a big food donation at the church when I was collecting food.  What a nice family reputation it is to have a reputation for giving. 
The United Methodist Men were meeting tonight at our church.  Our Pastor came outside right before we left and said to the girls, "Come in here and bring your fliers."  The girls did just that.  Our Pastor's husband, Pastor Jim had already heard about what Nat was doing so he quickly told the men that for her birthday, Natalie was giving to others and he challenged them to give to help the worthy causes.  When we left the church, Natalie had collected a bag of newspapers, 2 pairs of socks, a bag of donations for SafeHome and $96 in cash.  When we got back home, our neighbor threw in $4 to make it an even $100.  Natalie will split that and make a $50 monetary donation to the Humane Society and a $50 donation to SafeHomes.  I'm not disgusted anymore.  I'm not discouraged.  Through tears, I can say that I am ENCOURAGED.  I'm so very encouraged.  Keep hoppin Nat :) 

9 Random Acts of Kindess Birthday Party...

"If you have much, give of your wealth; If you have little, give of your heart”

Natalie's 9th birthday is Monday, July 25 and on August 12, we are doing a “9 Random Acts of Kindness” Birthday Party (9 for 9 years old!)

I can't take credit for this idea, as I was inspired to do this particular party from the following blog post I stumbled upon:  http://theletteredcottage.net/sweet-party-ideas

I love birthdays.  I love my friends and family and I love celebrating life.  After a birthday, my very frugal father will always say, "Ya went a little overboard again didn't you?"  Maybe Definately so, but I don't want my kids' birthdays to be "just another day." 

With inspiration from this blog post, Natalie and I have come up with 9 random acts of kindness that we have planned for the birthday party:

1) Donation/Volunteer at Safehomes (will check to see what they need)
2) Walk dogs and leave treats at Animal Shelter
3) Take homemade treats for the residents and staff at the nursing home
4) Take flowers to hospital and leave for the volunteers to give to patients who don't have flowers
5) Volunteer at Food Pantry (my mom does the Snack Packs for needy kids (they pack them at South Covington UMC) so she is going to show them what they do)
6) Stand outside Walmart and hand out free lollipops to kids (and young at heart!)
7) Place fliers under windshield wipers in Walmart Parking Lot that say “It’s Natalie’s 9th Birthday and we are celebrating by doing 9 random acts of kindness! Have a great day and pass on an act of kindness today!”
8) Go through the McDonald's drive thru and pay for the person behind us
9) Put change in all of the gumball machines and drink machines at the supermarket

When we return from our adventure, we will have birthday cake and food and watch this little diddy...

And then there is this scene from The Pursuit of Happyness makes me cry like a baby...

We will take plenty of pictures and shoot plenty of video during the day and it is my hope to make the girls a DVD of our pictures throughout the day and mail to them the following week.  I’ll be sure to upload it on here for all of you to see as well!

I can’t wait to see the faces of giving…

“You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” ~Kahlil Gibran

P.S. Feel free to copy this idea and do your own random acts of kindess party!

UPDATE!!!  Here is how the day went!

Well it's Father's Day.  June 19, 2011.  Hopefully Kevin had a good day.  He has been working nights and pretty much we could have handed him the keys to a brand new corvette and we would have probably gotten a half-smile at best.  Tonight is his last night though and then he starts vacation.  He's lucky that he is one of those people that everybody likes.  There's an older guy at the mill that likes him and each year, Bo hands him the vacation sign-up sheet and let's him pick a good summer week, while Bo takes a crappy week in the winter that Kevin would've gotten if not for trading with him. 

Natalie has been gone to Busch Gardens for three days with a friend and I have been missing her like crazy.  I didn't realize how much I love having her around.  Vacations from kids (and vice versa) are good.  Missing somebody is good for the soul.  I redecorated Natalie's room for her while she was gone and I am hoping she will be totally surprised and love it.  I didn't do any of the things I thought I was going to do.  I didn't repaint, but instead, I updated fabrics, rearranged furniture, and got new rugs and curtains.

It's fine with me.  It's cute enough.  It doesn't twang my buds like a big fluffy white down comforter and white gauzy drapes, but that's not real thrilling to an almost 9 year old I suppose.  Well at least not Natalie.  I left the room sort of bare bones besides the new fabrics because I want her to put her input into the rest of the room.  I made this for her a while back and can't wait to get it attached above her bed...

It was a fun project that I found from a really cool blog http://karapaslaydesigns.blogspot.com/  I used foam core and then crumpled up tissue paper and glued to the foam core.  I cut the letters out of magazine pictures to give the glossy finish and the border is some zebra fabric I had leftover from a previous project.  I just have to figure out how the heck I'm going to attach it!

We will be heading to Indiana for Kevin's family reunion this month and all of my closest buds laugh as they describe the trip as (and I quote) "The Griswolds go to Indiana."  Just to bring that statement to life, let me describe my morning at church with the kids.  My kids have been raised in church and they are normally as well behaved as any kids who have been raised in church are.  Today somebody must have slipped them a Red Bull or a Monster though.  They were bouncing off the walls!  They were giggling about the announcement of a PPR meeting (PP hee hee).  They were talking and not sitting still.  At one point, out of nowhere, a flash fills the congregation.  I looked over and Wyatt had dug my camera out of my purse and turned it around to face him (which also faced the 10 rows behind us) and took a pic of himself.  Exhibit A...

Yeah...then I heard giggling behind us.  We have great people in our church that have "been there, done that" and giggle at my silly kiddos when I'm wanting to "jerk a knot in their tail."  After a prayer and a hymn, I saw another flash.  This time he got the hymnal...

Suffice it to say, the camera was jerked out of little hands and placed by mom for the remainder of the service.  If that wasn't crazy enough, this same child literally fell off the pew during the service.  He was lying down and wrapped up in his "prodigal son robe" and got tangled up and literally fell from the lying down position onto the floor.  My dad was sitting behind me and got so tickled that I thought he was going to have to leave.  Yeah. Yeah.  It's the Griffith Family Way of Life.

Pass it on...

I have a million things that I should be doing right now, but I need to write about last night’s experience while it’s still very fresh in my mind.
Last night I loaded up my kids and one extra one and we headed to Greenbrier East High School for a Habitat for Humanity basketball game.  It was the ABA WV Blazers team and a team put together from several WV high school girls basketball stand-outs along with some local and state “celebrities.”
What a wonderful night of entertainment…and despite the fact that I was given back $5 in change at the door when it should’ve been $15, I feel like they are the ones who got stiffed rather than me!  The little bit that I was capable of donating really was a drop in the bucket for the blessings that I received and the entertainment and fun provided.
Can you think of any other game you have ever gone to when the game was stopped for everyone (including the players) to do the chicken dance or the YMCA?

My oldest son got to go down and get “dressed up” in a WVU cap and a sequined purse before the start of the game and my youngest son got to throw a ball inbounds with the help of Bimbo Coles.  It was awesome.
After the game was over, all players stayed to sign autographs until the last autograph wanted was signed.

The family that the house was being built for—a young woman and her four children, under the age of six--were present and every time I saw her, she was wiping tears from her eyes.  She had been living with her four children in two bedrooms in a shelter.  The house will truly be a blessing to her.

Possibly the most inspirational part of the evening was when a lady sitting three rows down from us was asked to come out on the court.  One of the executives from Habitat was telling about the applicant process and told us all that this woman was an applicant waiting to be approved for a house.  The woman was shy and probably a little bit embarrassed (as I imagine we all would be in that position.)  I know I get embarrassed and proud when I have to ask my dad for $100 for something or another—much less when I am put in front of an entire crowd to let my needs known.  After the representative told about the journey, she made an announcement that this lady’s application had been approved and that she and her young son would be getting a Habitat for Humanity House within the next year.  The woman was so gracious and humbled and as she and the lady from Habitat embraced. 

I looked immediately in front of me and I am guessing it was either the mother or sister of the lady receiving the house.  She lifted her arms in the air and she began to sob.  She put her arms down and she’d look down at the lady on the court and then her arms lifted again and she cried and her mouth moved in what I know was praise and thankfulness to God.  She took her glasses off and wiped her eyes.  The lady receiving the house returned to her seat and they embraced and cried some more.  It was so profound and I hope I will never forget it.

You and I are so very blessed.  It is my hope that those who receive these gifts from Habitat for Humanity will go on to live their lives in a way that will continue to inspire us all to be loving, giving persons and to always be mindful of our fellow brothers and sisters around the world and in our own backyards who are in need—to continue the “pass it on” way of life.  If this is not the purpose of life, then what is?

Double Clicks & Amish Bling

Five more weeks of school!  I can’t believe I have come this far.  Of course I have a LONG road ahead of me, but I am forging along and keeping one eye on the prize and the other eye on the three classes at a time I will take to attain this much desired teaching profession.  I am still trying to get the balancing act down.  I wonder if I will ever truly be able to do the balancing thing?  I am such a procrastinator and a “last-minute, under-pressure" kind of gal.

My mind is in constant rotation all hours that I am awake.  I constantly have dental appointments, classroom observation hours, work hours, sports practice days, grocery lists, home projects, inspirational quotes and thoughts, children’s ministries ideas, money worries.  Constant activity.  It’s truly exhausting. 

I was thinking tonight how I wish my brain was configured like my word processor.  I wish I had a System file in my brain and had folders in there for “Appointments, School, Work, House, Garden, Church, Creativity, Personal Maintenance, Vehicles.”  Each of those folders would then have subfolders—Doctor, Dental, Orthodontist; Stats, Lit, Education; Work days and hours; Cleaning, decorating, projects; plants, hardscapes; kids’ projects, birthday parties, entertaining, inspiration; hair, nails, skincare, diet, exercise, meal planning.  How completely awesome would it be to have an organized brain like that?  I could just pull out one of those files and know exactly what it is that I am supposed to be responsible for tomorrow at 10 am and I won’t show up a month early or a week late for a dentist appointment.  I won’t forget to pack lunches or wash basketball jerseys.  I could pull out my organized to-do list and maybe the last of the kitchen painting wouldn’t be 7 months overdue. 

When I actually have a weekend without responsibilities (okay, it’s my dream…go with it) I could click the file marked creativity and double click “make inspiration wall for Natalie’s room” and actually be focused enough to do it.  But nooooo.  What do I do?  I just have it all jumbled up in my head and my “free time” is spent playing catch-up on wiping the footprints out of the bottom of the fridge and sitting down and reading the newspaper from a week ago that I didn’t have time to read or my favorite…walking around the house shaking my head because it’s all a disaster and I can’t even find a starting point.

It’s so overwhelming sometimes…this life thing—marriage and parenting and the ins and outs of managing a household.  I often think back to when I only had one child…or even two.  Back when they were small.  It was so easy back then.  But guess what?  It WASN’T easy then!  It was tough!  I was sleep deprived, my boobs hurt from nursing, I had no idea when Riley would ever talk, and I smelled like a combination of baby poop and sour spit up.   Looking back it seems like the easiest times of my life though. One day when my kids are in college or I’m helping my daughter decide on a wedding dress, I’m going to think…man, it was so easy and slow when she was 8.

I spend a lot of time reading quotes.  I am a self-professed quote junkie and am very inspired by the great words of others.  I keep a file of quotes (not in my brain) but on my computer :)  I send my friends text messages almost daily with some feel-good quote that I have run across in my reading.  I saw a quote not so long ago about the past and the future.  Of course I forgot to save it, but it was something like “We remember the past greater than it actually was and we see the future bleaker than it really is.”  That’s not the direct quote, but it’s something like that.  And it's so completely true.  When I was in high school, I remember people saying, "Enjoy these days.  They are the best of your life."  And in the respect that I didn't have any responsibilities to speak of...well, they were.  But they were also tough times.  I will tell my kids the same thing, but I know they will remember those days greater than they actually were.  I think back to the days when my children were babies.  I remember it being blissfully slow-paced and wonderful.  I am pretty sure it was hard as heck though.  I’m pretty sure I was sleep-deprived and lonely for adult interaction and a conversation that didn’t involve bodily functions or imaginary friends.

I am a woman who craves change and spontaneity and excitement, so one would think I would lovingly embrace the fast paced life I am living, yet more often than not, I would like to dig my heels in and bring time to a screeching halt.  I would like to catch up with the things that seem to hold me back so I can get to the things that I love.  I’d like to stop the motion of life and just smell the roses—sit down and enjoy that second cup of coffee instead of running out the door with it.  The pace of life is so very fast.  I often feel like we are all doing our children a disservice by over-scheduling their lives.  Do I stop it though?  No...I schedule right along with all of the rest of you, because I think they might be missing out on something.  I wonder if we’re all going to realize in twenty years that the things they missed out on were things like building forts and skipping rocks and making mud pies and playing hopscotch—the being kids stuff.

Last weekend I joked that I would like to move out in the middle of nowhere and pick up Amish-like practices.  I joked that I would trade in my sexy high-heeled boots and Bare Minerals cosmetics for starched blouses, skirts to my ankles and lace bonnets.  We would pick up a simpler way of life, grow our own food, raise our own livestock and maybe find a more enriching life.  I wonder how long I could actually last like that?  I wonder if I would find a more enriching life or if I would be a miserable Amish woman who burnt everything she cooked and who corrupted the entire population by forming a secret group to make some bling for our bonnets?

As much as I’d like to slow down life and play catch up, the truth is, I’d probably be more miserable than the electronic-addicted children I am raising.  So I guess I will keep muddling through life without my brain files and maybe I will start making some actual hard-copy lists to double click on the off-chance I find some free time along the way. 

"You're an idiot!"

This is a quote from the final episode of the sitcom, “8 Simple Rules” which starred John Ritter up until his death…

Cate: [reading Paul's last article]
Okay readers, today we're having a little pop quiz, it's multiple choice, so sharpen your number 2 pencils and put your thinking caps on. Ready?
Here's a quote: "Dad, you're an idiot."
Now, contestants, this was said to me because of which of the following transgressions? A: Coming to the breakfast table wearing pajamas and black socks?
B: Asking my oldest daughter if that guy I saw her talking to yesterday at school was her boyfriend?
C: Referring to rapper Fiddy Cent as "Fifty Cents"? or
D: Entering the room?
Okay, pencils down. Actually it was a trick question. The answer is all of the above. Now do you know how many times I called my father an idiot? Zero.
Why? Because I feared him.
Back then we didn't share our deep personal feelings, our deepest conversations usually revolved around the Tigers bull pen.
But MY kids, I can't get them to shut up!
There's not a feeling that my kids are afraid to express over and over and over.
And my wife reassures me this is a good thing over and over and over, and she's always right.
So do I wish that my kids feared me? Well my house would be quieter, and I'd spend a lot less time in the bathroom, but no.
Because I know that whenever they insult me whether it's a "You're an idiot," "You're a geek," or an "I hate you," an "I love you" isn't far behind.
And it's the knowledge that my wife and kids love me that makes it safe for me to wear pajamas and black socks to the breakfast table.

I remember this final episode of 8 Simple Rules. I remember this part of the show in particular.

I was sobbing at this point. The year was 2003. I was the proud Mom of a 5 year old preschooler and a 1 year old little girl. Everyone was saddened by the death of John Ritter…a television icon. The final episode made me think about family past, present and future…

I visited my grandparents last weekend. Words can’t express the love and admiration and complete adoration I have for my grandparents. I am their only grandchild. Only child and only grandchild. Perhaps I have been a wee bit spoiled in my life, but I have tried to always maintain graciousness for everything in my life that my parents and grandparents have given me. The most important thing they have given me didn’t hurt their wallets though…it has been their time. I have found myself getting caught up in the hustle and bustle of life over the last few years, and I feel like I haven’t been giving my kids the most basic of needs…my time. Sure, they have iPods and Wiis and Nintendo DS’s and DirecTV receivers in every room of the house , but I have been slacking in the time that I have been devoting to them. This is not something that I am proud of.

I was piddling at my grandparents’ house the other day and I wanted a sheet of paper. I looked around and found a spiral notebook and opened it up to grab a piece of paper. When I opened it up, I saw it dated the Fall of 2000 and it started “Dear Riley…” It went on to tell my then 2 year old son how much great grandma loved God and her family and him and the changing seasons and the beautiful world God made. As I flipped through the pages of the notebook, I couldn’t believe that she had left this treasure for my children. I wish the kids could’ve seen their great grandparents 25 years ago, when they were so much more lively and full of energy, but I am so very glad that they have had the opportunity to know these wonderful grandparents.

The following quote reminds me of my grandma:
“When I admire the wonder of a sunset or the beauty of the moon, my soul expands in worship of the Creator” ~Mahatma Gandhi

That’s my grandma, alright. She loves the basics in life. She and my Papaw have spent the bulk of their lives in their Bibles and in prayer and taking in the simple things of life…watching the robins in the spring, watching the gray squirrels run about the yard and quietly and selflessly giving to others.

Flipping through the pages of the notebook, the tears started flowing down my cheeks as my Grandma recited poems that she had learned in grade school about the fall leaves. She told the kids how I used to sit under a tree at Concord and write her letters (I had forgotten about this, but Momaw didn’t.) She told them about the winter snows of her childhood and how the winter soon turned into spring and then summer and all over again. My grandma really is the Proverbs 31 woman. I got to thinking about my life and my missteps and my imperfections. I could blog for the rest of my life, just on those things, alone. I think if there was something I could do butt backwards, I have done it. I got married at the ripe ole age of 20. I spent my 21st birthday 6 months pregnant, while most other girls my age were spring breaking in Daytona. I didn’t finish my Bachelor’s degree as I set out to do, and I don’t live in the big, roomy house in the suburbs like I always dreamed of. I have a stack of bills that I worry about getting paid every month. I yell at my kids too much. I get frustrated with life in general on a daily basis. I smoke from time to time, I drink from time to time, and there hasn’t been a day that has gone by in quite a few years that I didn’t utter a curse word. I keep balances on my credit cards, I don’t volunteer enough, and I complain too much, among a multitude of other faults I possess.

Last night I went to Oak Hill, West Virginia with my Dad to Family Night for my Papaw’s sister, Dorothy. Dorothy was Papaw’s last living sibling. Momaw and Dorothy lived together when Papaw went off to war. I walked in the chapel of the funeral home and looked in the casket at Aunt Dorothy. She didn’t look like the Dorothy who came down to Covington for my 8th birthday…the birthday when I got my orange 20 inch Huffy. She looked so old to me. I sat down on the pew in the chapel and I thought that it wouldn’t be too much longer until I would be there for Momaw or Papaw--Momaw will be 90 in July and Papw will be 91 in June. I thought about how much older Momaw and Papaw looked to me at that moment…just like Aunt Dorothy. Then I watched Momaw get up and work that room, like a movie star. I heard people say, “I have to get over there and talk to Thelma (that’s Momaw).” I watched her talk to Aunt Dorothy’s children and I know she was telling them stories about the “pet” groundhog that she and Dorothy bottle-fed, and the way they used to walk to the tippy-tops of the hills and sleigh-ride down when they were young--and I‘m sure she let them know that she had talked with Dorothy last week and made sure she had been reading her Bible and praying. I realized how many other people looked up to my grandma. I realized even more at that moment, what an incredible servant she was, and how important her friendship and thoughtfulness and faithfulness had been to so many people over the years. I thought about family and I thought about the kind of person I wanted to be.

On the ride home, I looked over at my Dad and thought about what a wonderful mother this man had. And I know that’s why he has been such a wonderful father to me. I thought about my grandma again and how she has always been there for me. I thought again about how everyone wanted to see her and hug her last night…I have a feeling she has been there for them over the years, too. She’s the best listener I know. She calls me every single morning. And sometimes I’m too “busy” to talk to her. Sometimes I don’t even answer the telephone. I’m not going to do that anymore. Sooner, rather than later, Momaw won’t be calling me on the telephone…she will be going home to be with Aunt Dorothy and her Mother and Father and all the other loved ones she has lost along this long, but yet so very short, journey of life.

I’m different from Momaw. Very different. I talk about things with my kids that she would never dream of talking about. Life is different in 2010 than it was in 1940. Raising kids is different. My Dad would’ve never called my grandmother an idiot when he was growing up--just like in the 8 Simple Rules dialogue. I’m sure I called my dad that though--and I’m CERTAIN my kids have called ME that. My Dad wouldn’t have run through my grandma’s house like my kids do…or uttered the word “fart” at the kitchen table. I am a lot different than my grandma in so many respects. I only hope our hearts are similar. I’m certain my heart will never be as huge and as pure as my grandmas, but I hope when I’m 89 and see my family at the funeral home, that they will all come to me and seek comfort and familiar-ness and love. I hope they will think about me on the ride home and think what a good listener I was and how I was always there for them…

Isn’t that what it’s all about? Being there for each other? Supporting one another and comforting one another when life is great and when we are so tired and so weary and so lost that we can’t lift our heads? Love can be defined in so many ways…here’s my latest stab at it…

Love…what does it mean? Does it mean this overwhelming feeling of needing someone and them needing you? Does it mean happiness? Does it mean smiles and light and sunshine and rainbows? Does it mean flowers and birds chirping? I have discovered that love means never giving up. God knows I’m a royal pain in the butt…so does my dad, my husband, my kids, my mom, my grandparents and my friends. Yet none of these people give up on me. I can say I’m sorry when I disappoint them or do things that are unpleasing to them and they forgive me. And when I forgive them for their imperfections, I return love.

Forgive Me Father, For I Have Sinned...Confessions of a Scatter-brained Mom of 3

Confessions of a Scatter-brained mom of 3...

Forgive me Father, for I have sinned…
It has been…oh good grief…I can’t even keep track of whether I showered or not on a daily basis…like I could possibly remember how many days it’s been since my last confession.

1. I’ve been driving what I refer to as “the short bus” this week. Actually it’s just my Town & Country, but when I fill it with kids to drop off at Preschool, it suddenly becomes bus-like to me. On Wednesday at my last pick-up of the morning, I buckled all children in their carseats and shut the sliding side door of the van...right on my thumb. I jumped and I cursed and I screamed. I got in the van and the pain intensified and I was shaking my thumb and saying my ouchies and then I asked the three 4 year olds to PLEASE give me some pity because that would make me feel better. You know what they did? Wyatt offered to drive the van and then Madelyn struck up a conversation with him about how he was too young to drive. I had to nip that small talk in the bud and tell them that they needed to focus on ME and asking me if I was ok. (They never did) I hope I didn’t say any words that they will later repeat when they mash their little appendages.

2. Wyatt is now on letter Q in preschool. For those of you who do not know this, Q is the 17th letter of the alphabet. So to sum this up, the Q worksheets are the 17th homework assignment that I have left on the refrigerator instead of sending in Wyatt’s backpack. Grrr…my best friend has informed me that perhaps the addition of sticky notes in my life would be a helpful addition.

3. I made chicken parmesan this week. Finally…something that doesn’t include the word “tot,” “minced,” or “processed.” I was doing great. Around 7:30 I discovered the oven was set at 350, but the Bake knob had been turned to OFF. You have to freaking be kidding me!!! We FINALLY had dinner at 8:30 that night, then straight to bed.

4. I ate an entire bag of Pepperidge Farm Mint Milano cookies. I don’t know how I did it. But I just couldn’t stop. In my defense…I had a very small lunch that day.

4. I have dyed my hair 4 times in 24 hours. I have spent enough money on Over The Counter hair dye that I could’ve gone to a Swedish Spa and had my hair colored and been fed Mint Milanos by a Sexy Swedish Cookie Baker.
You know how convicted felons cannot buy guns? Well people who have had to do color correction on their hair in the last 6 months should be placed on hair color probation and then have to be placed on some kind of wait list before being allowed to buy hair color from the drug store.

5. I completely forgot to take snacks to preschool in November. I just dropped Wyatt off snackless. That was the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. This oversight occurred to me on Sunday night AFTER Thanksgiving. I was mortified. I felt like the biggest loser-mom on the planet. Poor Wyatt…if he would’ve been born first, he would’ve had a much better shot at things…like a clean face for instance. Ok, well I swore I would never do that again. Wyatt had snacks last Friday. We had a snow day…funny joke, God. I bet it would’ve been 70 and sunny if I would’ve forgot those snacks again. Anyway, pretzels and sugar wafers are in the bag for next month if I don’t go off and forget them on top of the fridge with the homework.

6. I sent Natalie to school in brand new sneakers the other day. She outgrows things faster than lightning these days. She needed a new pair of sneakers…so we got her a new pair of sneakers. I put the new shoes on her and tied them and sent her on her way. When she stepped off the bus and through the door at 4 pm, she humiliatingly informed us that she was wearing 2 different shoes. Granted, this was a screw-up on the part of Shoe Show, but I tied the darn things that morning…seriously did not notice, though.

8. I recently cleaned the interior of my van. My dad told me (direct quote)…”I don’t think I’d clean it now…wait a couple more days and that way you can use a shovel.” You know those pockets behind the seats…great for stuffing coloring books or magazines in? Yeah, well one of the kids stuffed a McDonald’s cup in there apparently. It had a drink in it. I started pulling things out and seriously found a pile of napkins or something that I couldn’t identify due to the MILDEW that was growing on it!!!! Yeah, that was a lovely smell. Can’t imagine why I’ve been sicker than the average bear here lately (rolls eyes) Finally got rid of the smell and then the dog puked on the seat today. Go figure.

More confessions next week…unless I get perfect between now and then.

I'm Thankful For...But these other things sure do make life waaay more enjoyable!

In addition to the serious thins I am thankful for…(Jesus Christ, My family, kids, hub, my pets, my health, my friends, having all my needs met…)

I have listed and additional 20 things that make my life much more enjoyable!

Things I am Thankful For:

1. White composite filling material for my teeth. I have a bazillion fillings, but I can fool people into thinking I have perfect teeth!
2. Instant mashed potatoes.
3. Along the same lines…frozen pancakes.
4. HGTV, Lifetime, and Soapnet or as I call them…the Estrogen Trio.
5. Mr. Clean Magic Erasers.
6. Facebook--what an incredibly wonderful old-friend finder, new friend maker, Farmville/mafiawar addicting guilty pleasure.
7. Sensual Amber Bath and Body Works Lotion. Nobody knows I just stepped in puppy poo or somebody puked on me once I use this cover-scent.
8. Toll House Flipsides Pretzel Crackers. One of my guilty pleasures. Almost as good as a Reese Cup.--Half pretzel, half cracker.
9. Bud Light Lime and Backporchin’
10. Country Music and Hole in the wall Honky Tonks.
11. Nerf Dart Guns
12. Pine Sol (beyond it’s huge aphrodisiac quailties for my hub, I can also fill my sink with the stuff and everybody thinks my disgustingly dirty house is clean.
13. The Hamilton Beach Brewstation
14. Crest White Strips--takes care of the stains incurred in # 13
15. “Stretch” jeans (I find this one ESPECIALLY beneficial during this time of the year)
16. Hazelnut lattes
17. Clear spray Sunblock--not sure what I did back when I actually had to use my actual hands and “rub” it in.
18. Going through Whistling Tony’s aisle at Walmart.
19. Fleece Jammies--nothing quite like coming home cold and tired and surrounding yourself in quality K-Mart fleece. Aahhh…that’s the life
20. I would be amiss if I left out my cell phone. The thought of losing my phone or it getting destroyed gives me heart palpitations. I need that thing with me at all times…My lifeline my hub calls it. It’s true. I admit it and I am sure I need an intervention, but I really don’t want to imagine a world without cell phones. I love you Samsung Alias and I’m not ashamed to admit it.

Post Marley & Me Reflections...

Post Marley & Me Reflections…

Saturday night the kids went on sleepovers and I finally got a chance to stake my claim to the television. I rented Marley & Me. If you haven’t read the book or watched the movie…stop reading right here and go do that and then get back to my blog…it’ll be in my notes.

I had heard how this movie was going to make me cry. That’s a given for pretty much any movie for me though, so I was ready for that…

What I wasn’t ready for was an incredible story that I felt like I could’ve written myself. I can’t think of a movie where there were so many things that I could relate to…so many things that seemed to have been pulled right out of one of my journals. Of course the story wouldn't have been the same without Marley, but it was so much more than a movie about a dog.

I didn’t have a list going into my marriage. I’m not a big planner. And I’ve thought a lot about how life would’ve turned out if I would’ve had a plan…a 3 year plan…a 5 year plan…a 10 year plan. Kevin and I moved in together on Halloween of 1996. When we moved in together, I was taking about 15 credit hours at Concord and 12 at National Business College. I was in transition of transferring over to National Business College because I wasn’t sure that teaching was the route I wanted to take. Kevin worked all day and I went to school day and night and we met up for dinner and then he left for welding school at night.

He finished up his welding training in May of 1997 and I finished up at National in the fall of 97 right after we got married in August. I went through the May graduation ceremony at National all decked out in my cap and gown with my 4.0 average and my big ole belly…I was 6 months pregnant.

I had a short stint working in Bluefield at Willis Chiropractic--I was part-time and working mostly Saturday mornings and all day Saturday Health Fairs. After I found out I was pregnant, I knew immediately that I could not imagine a life of me working and somebody else with baby, so I quit my job and put every ounce of my being into preparing to be a Mom. Of course I would learn that within a year, the full-time Office Administrator would accept a job elsewhere and I could’ve worked myself into a great job. Ha. Wasn’t important to me then though.

October 4, 2:30 a.m. brought 9 lb., 4 .5 ounce Riley Parker Griffith into the world. I remember feeling exhausted and clueless and just a baby myself at a mere 21 years old. I brought this bundle home and spent every waking (and sleeping!) moment with him. We ate together, we slept together, we watched Barney together, we swung on the porch swing together, we went to the park together, we shopped at the mall together, we read and sang together. I loved being a Mom.

In 1999, we bought a house. It was a modest three bedroom house in a neighborhood in Bluefield that I loved. Kevin had landed a job in a coal prep plant that put us in a pretty good financial situation, so life was really great.

In July of 2001, I found out I was pregnant. I was completely overjoyed. I scheduled my doctor’s appointment and they did the early ultrasound, but couldn’t see the heartbeat, but I was still quite early, so I came back in a week. Still no heartbeat. So I came back in another week. Still no heartbeat and the measurements didn’t seem to look right either. I remember laying on that table and feeling so disappointed and heartbroken. When that scene occurred in the movie, I thought I had put all of that behind me…you reason that things happen in God’s timetable and you move on as best as you can. I think the truth is that you never completely heal from things like that. You just tuck them away and as time and life happens, they get better. I remember coming home and standing in the hallway and hugging Kevin and just crying…and crying and crying. So the scene when Jen hugs Marley and cries on the couch really triggered that moment back for me. I felt like I was transplanted back 8 years ago.

I was mad at the world, I was mad at God, and I was DEFINITELY not going to have anymore children because I could not risk that again. That was July 31, 2001.

Thanksgiving of that year, we would announce to our parents that we were having another baby.

July 25, 2002, Natalie Gray Griffith enters the world and our hearts.

January 2003, we would learn we were leaving Bluefield and moving to Covington.

March 25, 2003, Kevin started at the mill.

August 2003, we bought our house in Covington.

August 2004, Riley starts Kindergarten.

November 2004, I’m pregnant again. Just like in the movie, it was a shocker. The greatest surprise I’ve ever received though.

August 2007, Natalie starts Kindergarten--and I start classes at Dabney in pursuit of my Bachelor’s.

October 2008, I take the job as our church secretary.

August 2009, 3 kids in soccer, 2 in school and one in preschool…I decide to take a semester off from school to attempt to keep up with life.

October 2009...Life is a whirlwind. I am exhausted.

How many times have I had those mini-breakdowns on my bed just like in the movie where she is sooo tired that she can’t function? How many times have I cried in my pillow because somewhere in this life I feel like Amanda is lost somewhere under a pile of school permission forms, overdue bills, dirty laundry and forgotten dental appointments?

At some point though, I have to step back and forget plans, and regrets, and make sure I’m not missing out on the life that is happening right before my eyes. It won’t be there forever.

I have wondered if I would’ve been a better working mom than a stay-at-home mom. I’ve even wondered in my darkest hours if I was even supposed to be a mom. Then somebody will pick me a dead dandelion or give me an oreo-faced kiss and I know that this is where I’m supposed to be. Right here.

I’m probably never going to have a dime to my name. Maybe I’ll never have one single story I write ever published. But if I can raise these three children to be loving and gracious…to love God and others…then I will have accomplished something wonderful and more important than anything else on earth.