Someone said to my dad last week, “I thought Amanda must be
feeling bad because she hasn’t written in a while.” The truth is I haven’t been feeling as good
as I was the first six weeks. My allergies have really added to the being worn
down thing. I blow my nose around the clock and now I have a cough that sounds
like I have the pneumonic plague. Saturday I was showered and dressed and ready
to go to a lemonade stand and then on to a birthday party and I started getting
chills. I ended up running a fever that day and night. Seems it was probably
something viral. It has taken me a few days to bounce back from that.
I’m tired, I don’t focus on things so well, I’m coughing
every breath. I know. Sexy. A pajama wearing, forgetful, nearly bald woman with
the whooping cough. And I can't taste anything. Coffee is bland, pepperoni pizza is bland, Fruity Pebbles are bland. Doesn't really matter, I haven't been hungry in a few days anyway. I am making myself eat but the desire isn't really there.
I’m halfway through my chemo. I’m so ready to be done with
it all. I’m starting to feel impatient I think. I just want all this to be over
with so I can move on with my life. The
warm weather has caused me to think about being outdoors and I want to revamp
my back patio and I want to get a load of mulch and get my landscaping done. I want to repaint my kitchen cabinets. I
have a ton of different projects I’d love to get into, but I just don’t have
the energy to do them right now. And that
is very frustrating to me. I am trying
to just listen to my body and go when I feel like going and rest when I feel
like resting.
I’m looking forward to the school year finishing up so I can
have my kids at home. They will fight and tear the house to smithereens, but I
still like having them at home.
-lightning bug
I am sorry you feel so bad, prayers that all this misey will be worth the effort. I saw your dad today & told him how proud I am of you & your get-er-done attitude! God bless you!-love Ginger Lilly
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